Here's the first writing challenge of the Campaign...
Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “The door swung open” These four words will be included in the word count.
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), use the same beginning words and end with the words: "the door swung shut." (also included in the word count)
For those who want an even greater challenge, make your story 200 words EXACTLY!
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), use the same beginning words and end with the words: "the door swung shut." (also included in the word count)
For those who want an even greater challenge, make your story 200 words EXACTLY!
...My First Flash Fiction/Writing Challenge...
To Grant An Entrance, Nadja Notariani
The door swung open, revealing, at last, the object that had for weeks consumed her thoughts. Heart pounding, she raised her eyes, wary to expose destiny lest it disappoint, compelled toward discovery. At once, the presence engrossed her senses, dominating the modest surroundings.
Impressive height and broad shoulders enhanced the masculinity she beheld, eliciting a prickling of gooseflesh over her skin, whether from pleasure or apprehension not yet decided. Dark hair curled around forehead and temple, framing not a handsome face, but a strong and tolerable one. His eyes were what hers sought, the windows to his soul. She trembled in anticipation, felt the choking grip of fear weave its tendrils about her throat in the exquisite torment as she waited. Earthy warmth emanated from the depths that held her gaze, comforting, commanding, simmering with the promise of the heady emotion she had dared imagine while awaiting her arranged husband's arrival.
His hesitant smile opened the door to her heart a sliver as she accepted the wide, calloused hand he offered.
“I have come to take you home.”
His simple words whispered much.
Following him into the sunshine, she was vaguely aware as behind them the door swung shut.
Beautiful. Poetic and romantic. I'm glad I posted mine before I started reading everyone elses, I might not have had the guts to go up against such stiff competition.
ReplyDeleteLove the romance. Nice piece of writing.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jen! I enjoyed your piece, too. It is amazing to me how many variations come from out of those simple opening words.
ReplyDeleteAJ ~ I'm so glad you stopped by. I've read through number 27 so far. There are so many, I'll have to look again for yours. Thank you for your kind words. ~ Nadja
I like the dynamics you've set up between these two people. It's amazing what we can do with 200 words beginning with the same four.
ReplyDeleteThanks Theresa! I couldn't agree with you more. I have been so impressed with the variety of storylines. ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteNice description/emotion, but I found it a little creepy that she thinks of him as 'an object' in the first line :) ...it's so detached, it makes him seem less than human, somehow.
ReplyDeleteI love the fact it was her husband and not a man she was going to have a fling with! Don't know why but I liked to think fo the passion between a married couple. Good job Nadja!
ReplyDeleteI love that. You certainly have a way of setting tone within a few words. FABULOUS!
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one who gets super excited at the mention of a calloused hand? Great job!
ReplyDelete(((Em)))...Me too... We must be kindred spirits :)
ReplyDeleteChristine ~ thank you!
Alleged ~ You are not the only one...love a man who works with his hands... ha!
~ Nadja
Very interesting. Lots of description! I enjoyed it :)
ReplyDeleteLoooooove this! FYI I just went to your Amazon page to add CtP to my wishlist. Don't forget to tag your book so folks can find them...scoll down to the bottom of your amazon book page and fill in any appropriate tags. IIRC, you can also tag your amazon author page, but I'm not sure.
ReplyDeleteEast Coaster ~ Thanks for the tips. I'm new to all of this... Frankly, it's a bit overwhelming. I really appreciate you taking the time to help me better my amazon search results.
ReplyDeleteGiles ~ Thanks. I'm certain it's not what a guy would normally gravitate toward, so I say a hearty 'Thanks' for taking the time to read! :)
~ Nadja
Nice. Should all arranged marriages appear so promising. =D
ReplyDeletelove the arc of the story in so few words. :) great stuff!
ReplyDeleteNice! I love your romantic take on the challenge.
ReplyDeleteNice!
ReplyDeleteFellow campaigner here - we're in the same adult fiction group. I write just about everything - from PBs on up to adults. Looking forward to getting better acquainted!
Really atmospheric, you have managed to get so much into 200 words.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written, very emotional and romantic. Love it.
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking you write romance. Very nice. Well done.
ReplyDeleteGreat little story! I could see the scene play out!
ReplyDeleteA very romantic story! Well done.
ReplyDeleteAww, gorgeous! I love it!
ReplyDeleteWow, the anticipation is palpable! Very well done. I'm a new follower from the campaign - I've been following you around all day!
ReplyDeleteThanks to all! I'm so glad you all enjoyed this. It was my first 'go' at flash fiction - And it was incredibly fun. I will definitely try it again! ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteLove it! as far as arranged marriages go, I'm thinking this lady didn't do too badly. Wooo yeah!
ReplyDeleteI really like this. I love a good romance.
ReplyDeleteWow Nadja! Very evocative piece that vividly conveys what's going through the woman's mind. I like your style!
ReplyDeleteThanks Gary! That's something coming from the male perspective. Quite encouraging:) ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteNadja, I love this piece. So descriptive and so much said in those few words! This is a story I would read. Great Job!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Maeve! Lady Gwen, Tricia, Nicole, Jessica, Story, Ruth, Kristen, Angela, Susie, Nicole, Raelyn, Jodi, and Donna - You all are so great to stop by and comment. I've been reading all around today - and the list keeps growing. This will be a few days of reading, for sure. My son, who is fifteen, even sat and read a number of challenge entries with me. We both love all the different stories. ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteNicely done. I like the way you brought us to the obvious conclusion while still keeping it interesting. I'm #72
ReplyDeleteBeautifully romantic. Very well done. My in-laws were an arranged marriage and just celebrated their 50th a couple of weeks ago. :)
ReplyDeleteKimberly ~ That's really encouraging. Fifty years is quite an adventure! Arranged marriages are often highly successful - even in this country! It's not for everyone, though :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for stopping by and leaving such a wonderful comment!
Bridget ~ Nice to meet you! What groups are you joining in during the campaign?
~ Nadja
LOVE this! Your writing is beautiful and so sophisticated. I'd absolutely read more if this were the beginning of a novel. Great work!
ReplyDeleteThis left me wanting to know more about her. Where she was when he came for her, and why she was there. A lot of emotion in this scene, which hooks a reader in. I was glad it was the husband, too.
ReplyDeleteI was captivated by this. So much packed into 200 words. And very poetic.
ReplyDeleteSweet that the marriage is so full of affection and love. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThat was beautiful. An arranged husband -- she's got lucky, didn't she? I don't imagine they all go as well as that! You convey a lot in these 200 words. She's so hopeful, and he is going to fulfill those hopes.
ReplyDelete(By the way, you asked at my blog what a D'Eagle is... it's a gun. One is actually on the cover of my book, Sleeping with Skeletons.)
Awww, how sweet! :)
ReplyDeleteLovely! Nice reveal!
ReplyDeleteDo you know what my first reaction to this was? "Rowr!" Haha! I loved it. :)
ReplyDeleteI would love to know what happens next!
ReplyDeleteThanks again to everyone who has stopped by and commented! I'm still reading away...there are so many variations. I don't know how to vote anymore! I'm certainly glad I didn't get the call to judge for this one...lol. This is going to be a difficult job. I am ever impressed anew with everyone's creativity ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteVery poetic and romantic! I was caught off guard by the arranged husband. It then transported me to another country and the back to the 19th century. Would love to know what you were thinking.
ReplyDeletePatricia T.
Hi,
ReplyDeleteOh very nice, and sensual with it! ;)
best
F
Very nice. Excellent imagery. I could see this guy, and I could tell the POV character knew him well. Great job, Nadja! :)
ReplyDeleteIt adds a romantic and promising touch to the idea of arranged marriages .
ReplyDeleteI could actually see this scenario play out in my mind's eye ... vivid description ! Lovely !
You can read my entry at no.#59 on the linky list.
Oh, Nagja! That's wonderful. The description of the husband was hot. ; )
ReplyDeleteLovely writing. I would love to hear the rest of that story :)
ReplyDeleteOh, the intrigue and allure you have created here!
ReplyDeleteWonderful. I loved the feelings evoked in so few words.
ReplyDeleteMany thanks. I enjoyed the writing; it's great to hear friendly comments on something that is so gratifying to do. I've made it to #133 on the list, being entertained all the way along. ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteGreat and poetic entry. It was evocative and snared the reader immediately to draw him/her into your world and your MC's heart and head.
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting my blog, Roland
It's a poetic piece. I like that it's easy to feel the sense of completion to her thoughts. Well done.
ReplyDeleteLove, love, love the closing image; really made this hit home! Will you do another romance for the next challenge?
ReplyDeleteVery nice. Great descriptions!
ReplyDeleteWonderful imagery here, I can completely feel her awe when seeing him for the first time--pleasure and relief. Great job!
ReplyDeleteI love the way you described the scenery..nice story!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.doreenmcgettigan.com
This was so lyrical in the way it flowed. Really enjoyed this.
ReplyDeleteLOVE.
ReplyDeleteAlso, swooning. :D
You all are just great to leave such wonderful comments!
ReplyDeleteJamila ~ 'swooning'...quite possibly my favorite word in all the comments. I want to swoon...really. Ha!
~ Nadja
Very beautiful! I loved the hope and trust it conveyed. :D
ReplyDelete*Wow.*
ReplyDeleteI'm going to be very blunt here. As a man, I often think I lack the capacity to be enamored with or turned on by words. Not the case here, Nadja -- this is one of the most compassionate, intriguing, and sexy pieces I've read in quite awhile. Your word choice is beautiful and compelling.
I wish you all the best! I'm so excited to read more when you post it!
- Rance
'Gulp'
ReplyDelete'...Wonders if I'm up for the challenge...lol'
Thank you Rance! Really. ~ Nadja
The first romantic piece I've read for this challenge; it was lyrical and tastefully written. :)
ReplyDeleteI love the ending. Such a great build up, and, yes, very romantic.
ReplyDelete(I thought I'd already commented on your flash, but don't see a comment, so if I'm duplicating myself, apologies.)
Lovely
ReplyDeleteWow, this is one of the most beautifully worded, poetic love stories I have read, wish there was more. Like others have said you will be hard to beat I think. I know I could learn a lot from you.
ReplyDeleteNice! Beautiful, tastefully sexy, yet sweet. :) If only all arranged marriages could be so promising. ;)
ReplyDeleteAgain, thank you all! :) Patient - I think, after reading your entry - that you know quite a bit about writing romance! ;)
ReplyDelete~ Nadja
Lovely. So much evoked by that phrase, 'I have come to take you home.'
ReplyDeleteOooh I love the romance there!
ReplyDeleteI can say that I am not one for romantic readings. This, however, pulls you in. It takes you there to the sights, the feeling, and the emotion: anticipation, fear, and excitement. Keep it up, Nadja! Excellent work.
ReplyDeleteExquisite. :) Your descriptions are so poetic, and the romance... swoon worthy.
ReplyDeleteDeniz, Sangu, Julius, and Avery...Thank you :) What a great challenge this is! I've now read through entry 165. Whew! There are so many more... did you see?...over 300! ~ Nadja
ReplyDeleteOh this was fun. I love a happy ending :-)
ReplyDeleteYou did a FANTASTIC job with your 200 words, Nadja! Love the emotion you packed into this. Great story!
ReplyDeleteYou don't come across too many anticipated arranged marriages. I love that you made it exciting, romantic and dare I say...juicy:)
ReplyDeleteGreat job!
You have crammed a lot of emotion in this scene. I enjoyed the small snippet and I found myself wondering about your MC, where this is set and in what time.
ReplyDeleteHi,Nadja! Cool scene. I'm an Historical romance junkie too. That's what it felt like. Am I right? Great job.
ReplyDeleteGreat flash-fiction! Your 200 packed a lot of punch! Thank you so much for stopping by my blog and your sweet words of support!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone! I've been able to visit so many great blogs and read so many great posts as I visit back...~ Nadja
ReplyDelete